28 February 2016

Gratitude

How does one do this? How to say thanks for something this profound?

I finished my first chemotherapy session. I am still here, and functioning, but I gather it was not cut and dried. I reacted so badly to the initial dose of drugs that the doctors were forced to suspend the injection process. The special crash team dosed me with large (relatively) amounts of benadryl, while my doctor sat with my brother, until my reactions calmed down and the injection could go on.

 Or so I hear. I was of course there, but I was equally not. What I do know is the reaction to the chemotherapy has to have been somewhere near 10 on the pain scale.  Because I have almost no memory of it. A few disconnected flashes of searing hurt, and nothing. OK, some of that is really good doctoring. I could not have contributed anything, so why not let me stay unconscious? So some of this I know second hand.

Sue-z went to take care of grandkids thinking not much would happen. So except for caring, wonderful nursing, and medical staff it was just me when the chemo began. Except my brother Tom was there. I hear my brother Rick would be later. They stayed by me, without getting in the staff's way, until the danger had passed, and I was merely sleeping.

Sometimes siblings have difficult relationships. But also sometimes we recall that mom wanted us to have each other precisely so we could love each other -- and it works. So thank you both! You answered the call: A new command I give you, that you love one another.

I am blessed with a huge array of friends and family who love me, and a healing team that cares deeply about its patients. And always, till death do us part, there is Sue-z. Sue-z who keeps things going, refuses to tolerate my fears, and always affirms my eventual salvation. Cancer has little chance!

7 comments:

Christal said...

I'm really impressed with how well you have handled chemo so far. After your initial reaction and dose, you did beautifully. I harassed, I mean called hour nurse frequently to check on you after I got home from work and you slept peacefully through the rest of it. You've got a strong medical team and a equally strong family here to cheer you on. You can do it,Dad! Remember my homework awaits you.

Leonard said...

Love surrounds you. Blessings and more wishes for your comfort and healing. Len

JimB said...

I have not done all that well. I am blessed with you, my sons, brothers, and friends. I will win this battle because of them, stunningly careing professional staff, and always, prayers from many, many folks

JimB said...

So it does Len. I am grateful for yours too.

JimB said...

So it does Len. I am grateful for yours too.

JCF said...

Oh Jim! I was not aware of this. I just scrolled back through some of your blog posts, looking for a cancer diagnosis I'd missed (was it not recent? Still didn't see).

I wish I could contribute to you more than just prayer---but prayers you shall have. Kyrie eleison, Merciful Healing Christ!

{{{Jim and Sue-Z}}}

JimB said...

Prayers are what I need. I was diagnosed on Monday, and getting Chemo Tuesday. An aggressive lymphoma meeting a very professional oncologist and team.

THANKS

St Laika's

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