This whole Blog thing is harder than it looks. First there is the little matter of having a topic at all. Then there is the task of organizing one's thoughts. Then the actual process of writing comes up. A critical and oft over looked task, proofreading then appears. Finally, one must publish and await events. Frequently there are not any, sometimes someone actually engages the blogger with comments. And at least some of the time, those comments can be a bit harsh.

The obvious question arises, "why bother?" I guess I bother because I actually think I have something to say, and because the discipline of deciding what that might be and saying it coherently is valuable in its own right. I hope someone reads my scribbling, and even comments on them, but I might well write them if I knew no one would.

This is a long time bad habit. I wrote essays for my own use when I was a teenager. I think all of them are, thank heaven, long lost. I learned from them, the process of thinking through an essay and writing it takes time and discipline.

I have been relatively quiet as the General Convention and its aftermath have provided a tsunami of ideas, but not a lot of organized thought. It seems to me that this is a common reaction to the sort of climactic event GC and the various responses from the spin-masters represents. One needs to take a deep breath or several, pray, and think before setting pen or keyboard in motion.

Emerging from the fog of events, finding a clear space, and organizing one’s thoughts all take a while. Or, perhaps not, if as a partisan a person already knows the reaction before the events. I want to think the instant responders in various organizations are intellectually dishonest. I really do. I can’t.

Before the events, there was a certain sense on my side of the aisle, and others, I think, that can only be called arrogance. As the old joke has it, we were sure God would agree with us if He had all the facts. We forget that the Spirit blows where it will. We also forget that sometimes, the evil one wins an inning or two, but that he always looses the game.
It is hard to take a long view when your friends and associates are the ones paying for your calm. It should be hard! That is not the pain of my dashed hopes one hears from Columbus. I was not ever, even when I was a postulant, a candidate for bishop! And as I have had the good fortune to remain a lay person, it will be ever so. But my brothers and sisters, who do have leadership gifts that would make sense to diocese, they pay. And that is a shame, indeed an outrage.

So, I guess I shall continue to be offended by GC’06. I shall continue to work as I am able to make the church a safe and more than that place for lesbian / gay Christians. I will undoubtedly offend some of my traditionalist friends, and I will undoubtedly fail my own vision. I hope all will forgive, and I will try to do so myself. For the rest, the Spirit blows where it will.