20 October 2008


I have intended to use this blog as a place for I hope, thoughtful essays mostly centered on my church. I am finding that some times I need to write about more personal things and I hope my select readership does not mind.

Thanks to all who either via comment or email let me know you are praying for
Stephan. Yes to answer several queries, that is how we spell it, with an "a."

I am sad to report that the news is not good. Stephan has taken the view that he will need to leave at the end of the month. Variously as his delusions move him, we hear he is going to be moving to Brazil (he has no passport) Nevada, California and various local friends' apartments. We also hear his friends, "hate" him because they wont let him be a roommate.

He is doing some things that are leave-taking oriented. He invited me to what he called a 'play date' shooting at the local range. Stephan was well behaved, we shot a box of ammo (100 rounds) and enjoyed the time. Target ranges are noisy. There is little opportunity for conversation and that may have actually helped.

When we did talk, I pointed out again that all he has to do is comply with an agreed upon treatment regime to stay. He is, "thinking about it." So, we shall see.

This morning he was tumbling from thought to thought so fast sentences changed subjects.

Still there is no help for him. He cannot under our law be compelled to take medication. He cannot under our law be involentarily hospitalized. So we wait for All Hallows and we pray.

Holy Raphael who is like God, pray with us for Stephan.


Being Peace said...

God bless you and your family. You are all in my prayers.

Fran said...

Oh Jim- so many prayers for you all.

June Butler said...

Jim, this is a heartbreaker, most certainly. I offer my prayers for Stephan, and for you and your wife and other son. This will probably be the hardest thing you will ever do, but you must do what you must do.

I don't know what else to say, except that I shall pray for all of you. I wish I had words of consolation to offer you, but sadly, words fail me at this moment.

The Religious PĂ­caro said...

Prayers and Mass intentions...

Paul said...

Prayers joining the community and San Rafael.

Kirstin said...

Praying for all of you.

it's margaret said...

Jim --you and your family will be in my prayers.

Lindy said...

Peace for you and your son, your whole family.

Unknown said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Beryl Simkins said...

Thoughts and prayers for you and all of your family. Once we have children they are ever with us.

Sara said...

Your story is much the same as ours. It really touched me now as we have just arrived at our 22 year old daughter's rehab facility for our first "Family Workshop". She has been in for almost 4 months. The psychologist thinks she is bi-polar but she doesn't agree and won't take the meds. We join you in prayer for your son and also for the family. We understand that "tough" love doesn't even begin to cover it. I know I appreciate it when I know that we are not alone in our pain. Peace, Sara

JimB said...

Thank you all for your prayers and loving support.


I shall pray for you and your daughter. It is a long, hard and bitter road, but the meds do work if the person can finally come to see the need.


JimB said...

Personal to Two Auntees:

I do not quite understand why, but Blogger seems to have killed your post. I sent it for posting, and it never got here.




Grace said...

Jim, I'm so sorry. I know this must be a tremendous concern.

You, and your family are certainly in my prayers. If it's ok to ask, what is leading your son to refuse any treatment?

Is he concerned for any possible stigma, or worried about the effects of the meds?

You can file a 302 petition for an involuntary placement for him, if you can share evidence that he presents a clear, and present danger to himself, or others.

JimB said...


Stephan has as many bi-polars do I am told, has learned to like the highs. He thinks he is in charge although his mind tumbles so fast he often changes subject mid-sentence.

Illinois is, rightfully, very tough on involuntary hospitalizations. I am reasonably sure after chatting with both a lawyer and a psychologist that he can skirt the edge and defeat a filing.

The involuntary rules are good ones -- we should not easily take a person's freedom nor should we force treatement on someone. Unfortunately, some folks fall through the cracks in the system and Stephan appears to be one such.

Thanks for visiting and posting. It helps to know others are out there praying with us.


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